To All 3 People Who Read My Blog

Alright I actually have a great reason for not posting. The GREATEST reason.

That's right Mr Sweet Cheeks is here. Blake Thomas Benson or as Lola calls him Blank Thomas was born February 25th. Seriously I am so in love.

And for those interested in the nitty gritty details of the birth story...

Lola I did a natural birth. It was 2 days of labor and 3 1/2 hours of pushing. Crazy right? No crazy is doing natural birth again (that's right on purpose) for Ryder. Almost 2 days of labor and 3 pushes (much better than Lola). Blake induction and an epidural. I HEART EPIDURALS.  7 hours 3 pushes. Chances of me doing a natural birth again... zero. Seriously after doing both I feel like a fool for doing natural twice. 

How to Avoid Plugging Your Toilet and Other Kid Made Disasters

Mmmkay, the good news is that to be a Mom you don't have to be a genius or clever or benevolent (although I'm sure those things help). Really there are 2 things that really help prevent kid-made-house-disasters. Ready?

LISTEN and be QUICK

For example, after your daughter goes to the bathroom if she informs you that she used "many wet wipes" that is a code. You will only hear this code if you are listening. This code phrase means "I filled up the toilet with the entire roll of toilet paper." (Listening also entails being aware of silence, silence and evil are often combined and you will find a kid dusting your front window butt-naked or sitting in your bathroom sink eating a tube of toothpaste, hypothetically of course.)

Now when you find this hypothetical toilet filled with urine and 10lbs of toilet paper this is the time to be quick. Why? Because while you decide how to fish out the paper without putting your hand in the toilet (man a few more minutes and our noodle spoon would've sacred its life), your other child will throw in one of his wood puzzle pieces while the original offender proceeds to flush the toilet. Then both hands will be submerged into the toilet to retrieve both items.

Mmmkay you've been properly warned
LISTEN and be QUICK.

Mother of the Year and Belly Butts

Lola has picked up a new phrase lately--as a disclaimer let me just say I have no idea where she learned it. Yesterday before dinner she told me, "Your two poor children are hungry." Being the good mother that I am I fed them.

Lola likes to shorten words, her newest chopped word of choice is belly button. That's right she now refers to them as belly butts. I assured her I was the only one in the family with a belly butt.

(Ha! Just for the record I didn't realize how short my sweater was till I saw this picture.)

Belly Butt for sure.

Lola's Prayer

Heavenly Father,
Thank you for Mommy, Daddy, Morning, Grammy, and Ryder.
And for Lola too.
And for toothbrushes.

Row 2 Seats 13 and 14

We love going to Jazz games,
but we can't really afford to go to Jazz games...
but a perk of Jon's job is we keep getting free fifty free tickets.
Our latest (and greatest ever!) tickets were these.

Yep, $579 dollars for these tickets
I'm not going to lie we considered hawking these
but went anyway and it was SO FUN!
Best free date ever (minus the $8 bucks for soda, seriously $8 bucks for 2 sodas!)

Here is what I learned in the expensive seats.
Cavaliers seriously are the worst team in the NBA.
The expensive seats smells much better than the upper bowl
(not that the upper bowl stinks,
but down at the expensive seats it smelled like expensive cologne).
Basketball players are BIG dudes,
I mean really big, like they could crush-me-with-one-hand-big.
And lastly Jerry Sloan (Head coach of the Jazz)
looks like my father-in-law.

Seriously don't they look like brothers, cousins, something?

Matchy-Matchy

Mother and daughter matching dresses

There is just something so horrible about. I think its due to the fact I get flashbacks from the 80s and me being forced to wear matchy-matchy outfits with my little sister.

But Mother/daughter aprons that is classy right?

Right?
Maybe?
LOL
Well truth be told I don't actual care.
Lola on the other might care--
as a teenager,
but currently as a 3 year old she thinks its cool
It could be worse...

I HEART Jon

January 5th again.

Best decision ever.
No regrets...
Not even the $90 dollar breakfast (especially the $90 breakfast).
You are my best friend ever
even when you attack me in your sleep,
or rile the kids up before their bedtime,
or eat 6 sausages and only leave me one.
I love you
even though I put horrible pictures of you on our blog.